I’ve never given much thought to how I would die — though I’d had reason enough in the last few months — but even if I had, I would not have imagined it like this.

Apparently, our nameless, faceless Narrator has not given much thought to the topic of death. This seems rather odd since Twilight is a book about vampires and werewolves.

… Whoops. SPOILER ALERT: Twilight is about vampires and werewolves.

The reason our Narrator is now thinking about death is because she is going to sacrifice herself for true love–a true love who, I suspect, is the very “sauntering hunter” that is about to kill her. But since our preface doesn’t go any further, we’re suppose to be left with an unresolved tension: Oh nose! Will our unknown hero escape? I guess the only way to find out is to read on!

You’d think that a preface of less than 150 words wouldn’t be able to aggravate me. You’d be wrong.

See,  stories that begin in media res are usually done so to get the reader excited. Essentially, you’re giving them a reason to turn the next two hundred pages.  So the start of your story has to hold some tension. Meyer attempts this with our Narrator informing us that she’s about to die and, by-golly, she doesn’t regret anything. While I appreciate the sentiment, this creates a major problem for the reader: if our Narrator doesn’t care about dying, why the hell should we?

With death taken out of the equation, what other possible reasons are there for us to turn the page? Fortunately, our Narrator does give us another hook: “when life offers you a dream so far beyond any of your expectations [blah blah blah]“. We’re supposed to read on to discover more about this incredible dream. That dream could be anything! Ahh tension! Glorious, glorious tension.

Unless, of course, you’ve read the blurb on the back: “Stephanie Meyer introduces Bella Swan and Edward Cullen, a pair of star-crossed lovers whose forbidden relationship ripens against the backdrop of small-town suspicion and a mysterious coven of vampires. This is a love story with bite.”

Our Narrator’s dream is love. With a vampire. Fair enough. I didn’t exactly pick up Twilight expecting The Life of Pi. But our Narrator immediately informs us that she doesn’t really care that her love story is about to end: “I couldn’t bring myself to regret the decision … it’s not reasonable to grieve when[life's wonderful dream] comes to an end”.

Compare this with an author like Michael Ondaatje. He is a master of building tension through a lack of information. The English Patient starts off with another nameless, faceless Narrator. We aren’t directly told anything about her, but we are immediately given a reason to care about her and the story: a mysterious man whose entire body has been burned. We care about this Narrator because she cares about something; we want to know more about this man because she wants to know more about this man. Meanwhile, our Twilight Narrator doesn’t care about anything! Note to all authors: apathetic characters inspire apathetic readers!

Finally, I feel obligated to point out that a preface is a note from the author, usually in which the creation of the book is discussed. Orson Scott Card tends to like these. Stephen King is notorious for using them, although he’ll often call them “Introductions” instead. A prologue provides an entrance into the story. It gives the reader a taste of what the book is going to be about, raises a few questions that will be answered, and is supposed to encourage further reading. Stephanie Meyer (and, more unusually, her editor) seem to believe that a prologue and a preface are synonymous. While this doesn’t necessary mean that Twilight is going be an awful experience, I’d like to think that the people involved in creating and publishing books put more effort into their works than just “OMG! VAMPIRES! PUBLISH!!!!111″.

On Friday night, a comedian died in New York. Someone knows why. Down there… somebody knows.

23 years ago the Watchmen comics were released. Alan Moore told us a story about heroes; about their motives, their dangers, their imperfections. And through-out the graphic novel we see the phrase “Who Watches The Watchmen?” crop up again and again. This goes back to Plato’s Republic and the question of how to build the Ideal City. People throw their trust behind the police and behind Nixon because of a lie, told by those in power, that gives them the “right” to rule. They watch over us do so because they are better than us.

Moore’s Watchmen, although heroes, are not better than us. They are broken men and women. The Comedian is a womanizer, a murderer, and a rapist. Doctor Manhattan is hardly human anymore, only attached to the rest of us through the Silk Spectre. Rorschach is a borderline sociopath who sees the world in absolutes (silly Rorschach. Only Sith deal in absolutes). Ozymandias is the King-figure, alone and ultimately responsible. He represents the same authority seen in President Nixon. And the second Nite Owl is an impotent shadow of his former self, a man without purpose or power. None of them are Superman. They are flawed. And, yet, we find ourselves loving them anyway.

There is a lot more that I could say about Watchmen the graphic novel. But I’ve seen the Watchmen movie a few times now and that’s what we’re here to talk about. Be aware, there will be spoilers within. If you haven’t seen the movie or read the graphic novel, I will probably ruin them both for you. I suggest going and doing both right now, don’t worry. The Internet will be here when you get back. Otherwise, scroll on brave reader.

SPOILERS BELOW

It should be obvious to you that I loved the Watchmen graphic novel. And starting off with that is a good a point as any. You see, there are people who hated Watchmen. People who thought it pretentious, artsy, pseudo-philosophic bullshit. And that’s fine. Everyone is allowed their own tastes. But if you hated Watchmen the graphic novel, you shouldn’t go see the movie. It is that simple. If you’re one of those people, no amount of praise I give will change your mind. You may as well stop reading here, as you’ll just find something to be angry about.

And to the die-hard fans, I hate to break it to you, but changes were made. This is not a scene for scene replication of the graphic novel. Veidt’s ultimate plan is cosmetically different, but serves the same purpose. Some lines are alter, either in who spoke them or when they’re spoken. And from the rabid fan-boy perspective, I have a hard time understanding why we didn’t see Hollis Mason’s death or why Rorschach didn’t burn Gerald Grice.

But to make a successful movie, change was necessary. There is too much in Watchmen to fit into a feature length film and not enough to realistically turn it into two or three. While incredibly interesting, the Tales of the Black Freighter is not essential. The same can be said of Veidt’s history. And The New Frontiersman. So, while my inner fanboy may cry out in terror with a million voices, the movie-goer in my suddenly silences them. Because Watchmen is a good movie.

Yes, a good movie. Clocking in a few minutes shy of three hours, Watchman is a satisfying experience from beginning to end.

We start with an opening montage (set to Bob Dylan’s “The Times They are a-Changin’”) that throws us into an alternate version of 1985; one where costumed heroes exist, where a science experiment gone wrong creates a walking god, where Vietnam was won by the Americans, where the Cold War is warming fast, and where Nixon is serving his fifth term as President.

From here we are introduced to the Watchmen. Of them, I always thought Rorschach and Dan Dreiberg were the heroes. Jackie Earle Haley and Patrick Wilson definitely manage to fill the giant-sized shoes of the characters. Jeffery Dean Morgan, as the Comedian, manages to balance on the edge of being an asshole and being charismatic. Everyone else plays their role well enough, not standing out when sitting back is required.

I do have to say that the movie has stunning visuals. The costumes, the sets, the digital effects, everything creates a style that is both an homage to the comic as well as stands by itself. It all looks impressive including Doctor Manhattan in all his glory.

Which brings up another point. Watchmen is rated R. And for a number of reasons: gore, violence, nudity, attempted rape, animal cruelty, implied violence to children. Some have complained that this is the “sexing up” of the comic, just to sell it to a mainstream audience. To which I retort: what kind of violence would you prefer? You didn’t see every drop of blood in the comic, but it was there. And in some cases, it was there a lot. They broke bones, they smashed skulls. As for the sex? It was there too.

(As it turns out, I’ve got a lot to say about the violence and sex in Watchmen. So at some point, I may post something about it. But until then, I’ll keep it simple. Rorschach’s pursuit of justice, Dan and Laurie’s violence, the Comedian’s monstrous nature, Doctor Manhattan’s inhumanity, and Veidt’s ultimate plan are all juxtaposed against each other. They’re all dealing with the brutality of their world in different ways. I think the comics did a better job of it, but I think that the movie tries to do the same thing albeit in a different way. And maybe it succeeds?)

Now was Watchmen perfect? Gods no. For starters, the music made me crazy. “99 Luftballons” has absolutely no place in… actually, anywhere. “The Sound of Silence” was just bad. The only two that I seem to be okay with in retrospect are “Hallelujah” during the sex scene, for sheer hilarity. And “All Along the Watchtower” because that may be my favorite Bob Dylan song. Otherwise, the person involved in adding music to the movie needs to be openly made fun of at parties. Which is an interesting conundrum, since the person who did the sound editing needs to be praised.

Crappy music at a few points is really my biggest problem with it as a movie. Sure, as a fan I can get upset over countless changes and lines and oddities, but what’s the point? After 23 years, this movie finally got made. Of course there were going to be changes, but for it to be as close to the comics as it is… That’s an impressive feat. Zack Snyder should get some serious kudos from fans. And from the general public. Watchmen, somehow, manages to both appeal to both the die-hards and the newbies.

I know this meager corner of the blogosphere ain’t much, but to Zach Snyder as well as the cast and crew of Watchmen… Thanks. You made this nerd’s day.

“Jon, wait, before you leave… I did the right thing, didn’t I? It all worked out in the end.”

“‘In the end’? Nothing ends Adrian. Nothing ever ends.”

(For the record, if you don’t trust my opinon on it, here’s the opinions of some people I trust. Alex of Batrock thought the music was awesome, the ending sucked, and didn’t like that The Island was missing (something I didn’t like either, but felt was unnecessary for the movie). The Rampant Coyote was glad to have seen it and will never see it again. Dave at Critical Hits liked it. And he likes that liked it differently than he did. Kaedrin and I see eye-to-eye on this being the best possible movie made of Watchmen. We might disagree on what that means exactly though And, to make this a game of “one of these things it not like the others, Roger Ebert proudly displays his nerd cred by loving it.)

Valve has a wonderful habit of releasing excellent games. They also have a habit of taking forever to release them. Why? Because they only put their name on a polished product. They want to be sure people will enjoy it. How do they manage this?

Play-testing. Hours and hours of play testing. With Half-Life 2 they gathered data on where the players died and used it to determine if some areas were unfairly difficult. Or pointlessly easy. Of course, this is just one instance and one use for that data, but I just want to bring up the point that a lot of work goes into making a Valve game fun.

While the play-testing that went into L4D is obvious in the game play, another area where it shines is the audio. Other folks have talked about the genius of the Audio Director. And they’re right to give credit to the music system of L4D. It procedurally generates music on the fly, based on dozens of in-game variables which provide important cues to the player as to what events will happen next. From the “there’s a witch” music to “here comes the horde”, Valve has given the player a reason to keep the in-game audio on. And they certainly deserve credit for it.

But I’m here to praise the dialogue. I know, you’re asking “Of all the things to talk about, why that?”. Because Valve has done something I have never seen before. And it’s brilliant.

If you’re simply playing alone and listening to the character banter, you might grin at the occasion witty quips (“You know what I don’t hate? I don’t hate this…”). Where the brilliance comes from is in multi-player:

You’re playing Death Toll with three of your buddies. After surviving a nasty horde, you’re all limping your way to the next safe area. A couple of you are on the verge of death and you’re prepared for a few tense minutes. In the distance, you can see a health pack sitting on a table. Before you can mention it, the character-voice of Louis shouts, “Medkit!”. Suddenly, you hear the familiar growl of a hunter. Pressing the voice-chat key, you shout “Hunter!” and half a second later, the Zoey-voice relays the same thing.

While everyone’s eyes scan ahead for the hunter, nobody notices when Bill gets dragged by a smoker. Your buddy playing Bill shouts, “Help! A smoker’s got me” at the same time as the Bill-character. Louis spins around, unloads a few shotgun blasts into the smoker. The Bill-player says, “Nice shooting” and the Bill-character says, “Nice shot, kid”.

This sort of dialogue synchronicity often happens in L4D with players and characters closely echoing each other. Does every line match up? Of course not. But it happens often enough to mention it.

Now sure, some of you are thinking “big deal”. And you’re right, in the grand scheme of things, dialogue synchronicity isn’t a vital component of a game. But it points to the amount of work that Valve puts into their products. Somewhere along the way, someone recognized that gamers were saying a lot of similar phrases at specific events. And they decided to add in this minor detail. Something they didn’t need to do to create an excellent game, but did so because they knew it would be cool for the player.

And that’s why Valve will always be one of the top game developers: their focus on creating the fullest, most entertaining product possible.

To do that we must set the WABAC machine to 1940, when a young man named Frank Herbert is 20 years old and has an idea for a story he would like to tell. It is set in the deep reaches of space on a planet called Arrakis. He shares it with his friends and they have their own visions of characters and stories to be told within this Dune-world. Thus, decades before Dungeons & Dragons sees the light of day, Frank Herbert sits down to be Dungeon Master for the Dune role-playing game.

The World

Arrakis is one of the planets in the Known Universe. There are hundreds of them, all with their own stories and peoples. But Arrakis is special. It is a desert planet, where surviving from day-to-day is often a battle itself. The only reason for colonization of such a harsh would is the spice melange, an amazing drug that has become essential to the lives of billions. It is here where the Dune role-playing game takes places and Herbert’s story lives to be told.

Combat

The Dune RPG needs various combat systems. We need rules for hand-to-hand, for gun-play, for las-guns. And all of these, although cool, aren’t really interesting or specific to Dune for us today. Any number of other role-playing games already have ways of covering them. But Dune has something unique; the sacred spice melange. It adds centuries to normal lifespans. It connects the various planets in the universe, as it is a catalyst for interstellar travel. Neither of these are terribly interesting from a rule-creation system.

Spice can be used to instill prescience or glimpses into the future. Even those who take the bare minimum of the addictive drug gain strange prophetic dreams. In extreme doses it can unlock super-human powers: blinding speed, incredible mental facilities, ancestral memory.

Immediately the connection to magic is seen. But it needs to be more than just spells. The spice is dangerous and abusing it on simple whims can kill. To that effect, I look to the d20 Call of Cthulhu system of Sanity. Except instead of losing their minds at the horrors of the Mythos, a character could become trapped in the visions of the future and be unable to act in the world. Or one of their ancestors, unwilling to stay dead, would overpower their mind and assume control. Death, too, would be a possibility. Some, like the Bene Gesserit, are less likely to succumb to these dangers, but their powers would be weaker. Others would gain incredible abilities, but walk a fine line between human and abomination.

Careers

In Dungeons & Dragons there are a number of races and classes to choose from to build your character. In the Dune universe, everyone is (mostly) human.

First we have the fremen. The warrior people who come exclusively from the vast deserts of Arrakis. They are able to survive indefinitely in the sands. They are masters of melée combat, trained from birth to be fierce fighters. A fremen needs no weapon to be dangerous, but when you see one with a crysknife beware, for their blades always see blood.

Next are the Bene Gesserit. Seen by all as witches, they are an order of women who manipulate the human race from their own goals. As well, they are masters of the spice, able to do the unbelievable thanks to it. In addition, their years of training have made them the unseen masters on the battlefield. The only way you will know you are fighting a Bene Gesserit is when their knife is already in your back.

One could also be a member of the various noble Houses. Each one is different, masters of their own set of skills. The Harkonnen avoid direct combat, but are dangerous from afar. In hand-to-hand the Atreides are almost as deadly as the fremen. With a number of Minor and Major Houses, nobility would be a very customizable career path.

The Ixian Confederacy would be a choice for those who don’t wish to put their own bodies in harms way. These men and women are easily bested in combat. Instead of spending years training their bodies, they chose to become masters of technology. As such, they create weapons and machines that do their dirty work. Even with the ban on thinking machines, there are rumors that some Ixian technologies come close to conscious robots, able to think for themselves.

Finally, there are the “servants” of the Dune universe. The conditioned Suk who, in exchange for imperial training, are unable to cause harm. Most common are the Suk doctors, able to work miracles with the injured or sick, in exchange for their truly Hippocratic oath. While a Suk would never hurt someone themselves, they do not avoid wars or battles. As such, properly trained Suk are often sought after for various battlefield jobs.

Characters

The Dune story is about the Paul Atreides and his transformation from noble son of a failing House to Muad’Dib, Emperor of the Known Universe. Right away, this is a problem. While a book can focus on a single character, an RPG must make each player feel important. No longer can Paul be the Kwisatz Haderach if the remaining characters are not equally powerful. Thus, Dune must become a story about a group of heroes…

First is Paul Atreides. He is a young man caught between two worlds: the noble, political life of his father and the mystical life of his Bene Gesserit mother. Unable to choose, he straddles that divide. He sees himself as the fulfillment of centuries of prophecy.

Next is Stilgar. The wild fremen, knowledgeable in the ways of the desert. He has spent his entire life protecting his people from the Harkonnen. One day he may find himself leading the fremen, but for now he works with the ragtag group of survivors of House Atreides on the principle that “the enemy of my enemy is my friend”.

Princess Irulan is heir to the throne of the galactic empire, but also a Bene Gesserit sister. She was originally a spy, seeking to gain control over Paul Atreides and stabilize Arrakis for the sisterhood. She falls in love with Paul and betrays both the Bene Gesserit and her father. Now she works for House Atreides in an effort to make up for her past, as well as remain close to Paul.

The loyal Swordmaster of the Atreides, Duncan Idaho. He has protected the members of the House for many years. Viewing the Duke Leto’s death as his fault, Idaho keeps Paul close to his side. The man has a single flaw, his weakness for the Lady Jessica, Paul’s mother.

And finally, Dr. Wellington Yueh. A Suk doctor who is bound, through intense psychological conditioning, to do no harm. He has always worked for House Atreides, but when the Harkonnens captured his wife, he turned on his friends. It is he who betrayed the Duke Leto and forced House Atreides into hiding. When the Baron Knowing he will never be forgiven if he is discovered, Yueh works with the Atreides to kill the Baron Harkonnen.

The Story

Now we have a bunch of motivations and goals for these characters. Overall, they want to return House Atreides to power. So we’ve got a campaign. Unfortunately, Frank Herbert had his own plans which were shot to hell when his players picked their characters. Originally he wanted a metaphorical story that spoke to the dangers of empire and power. Both the Emperor and Baron Harkonnen would fall because of their very desire to rule over people. Herbert wanted spice to be a metaphor for foreign oil and to show our addiction to it was dangerous. That analogue is lost with melange as a source of magic. Here is the way I imagine that Herbert would try to tell his Dune story.

The campaign starts off with the various characters living their lives on Arrakis. Yueh’s betrayal is the beginning, but it quickly turns into an all out battle when the Harkonnens attack and overwhelm the Atreides. Paul discovers the death of his father, Irulan recognizes that the Harkonnens are bolstered by her father’s troops, Idaho feels he is responsible for not foreseeing the attack, Yueh’s wife is brutally executed by the Harkonnens. Together they escape into the desert, taking refuge with Stilgar’s people. Unfortunately, in his time away from the fremen, his leadership position has been stripped of him. He, too, is now an outsider.

The early campaign would be all about the group discovering their place in this new environment. They would have to prove themselves worthy of the fremen’s friendship. Paul’s mother, the Lady Jessica, would be the only exception. Her Bene Gesserit sisters had, long ago, planted certain religious prophecies among the fremen. These prophecies were designed to help a Sister in case she was ever forced to live among the desert people. She becomes the connection between the group and the fremen.

The group would have missions to steal spice from Harkonnen, both for personal use and for the fremen. They’d be asked to keep the prying eyes of both the Emperor and the Baron away from the sietches by attacking cities. Meanwhile, Jessica would spread further prophecies about a group of “fallen nobility”. As the group members showed themselves to be strong allies, they would be let into the fremen fold. The spice users in the group would start to receive visions of a terrible future: a universe torn apart by war, entire planets eradicated, billions dead, and humanity on the verge of extinction. Eventually, the entire fremen people would begin to have dreams of that same future. Jessica would begin making plans to prevent it, starting a religion based on a Golden Path for the future, with the Atreides group at the center of it.

As Jessica begins to obsess with discovering the future, we see Herbert’s original intentions for Paul: ecological issues, empire, water, the dangers of the future, fundamentalism. Meanwhile, the group gets to experience the burdens of heroics, the notions that evil and good can be cut from the same cloth, that sacrifice is a necessary hurdle. And we also get to see some personal resolutions. Stilgar sees the thriving fremen. Yueh sacrifices himself to kill the Baron, saving his friends (the player then takes on the character of Gurney Halleck). Duncan helps Jessica, showing her how to return to the “now”. Irulan thwarts her father’s plans to place the Harkonnen Baron on the Throne by marrying Paul. And Paul returns House Atreides to a place of power.

And that’s where the first campaign would end… The fremen would be spreading across the universe, preaching the word of the Golden Path. The Emperor and the Harkonnens would be fugitives, seeking to escape the Atreides sword. The Bene Gesserit would no longer have a tight grip on the future of the human race. For a brief period, the universe would be safe. But this would not be the end for the characters. There are still many stories to be told about them. After all, there is Duncan and Jessica’s child who shows signs of abomination. There is the Bene Gesserit alliance with the surviving Harkonnens and the spice-hungry Spacing Guild, who all seek to remove the Atreides from Arrakis.

The saga of Dune is far from over…

Single Player

Most of my game collection is single player. I don’t really play well with others. So the solo experience of a game has to enthrall me. It’s why I think the Halo games are lousy. And why I prefer Grand Theft Auto to Call of Duty.

There were a number of good ones this year. GTA4 really was a blast. But for a solo game to really be worthwhile I need to be able to pick it up a month later and still have fun. Yes, GTA4 did a lot of cool things that I enjoyed, but I’ve got no reason to pick it up again.

I will pick up Fallout 3 again. Sure, the game has buggy parts and the writing is all kinds of horrid, but F3 is fun. There is a huge world to explore. V.A.T.S. makes the combat interesting and is unique to the game. And after I beat it once, I started over again. And will do so again a few months from now.

So, Fallout 3 is my Single Player Game of 2008.

Multi-player

The year I spent in Engineering was a waste of my time. Fortunately, most of that time was really just spent playing Super Smash Bros on the N64. So when SSB Brawl was released this year, I thought I would get into it. Except I haven’t. It was fun with certain people, but that was where the major appeal was. Likewise with the Gears of War series or Mortal Kombat vs DC. Sure, they aren’t awful, but there isn’t anything there for me outside of the social aspect.

When thinking about that, I almost gave Rock Band 2 the top spot. And if you’ve played it, you know why. The game is a fantastic party game no matter who you’re with. But one game edged it out.

I love killing zombies. Some might say it is an unnatural love. But Valve doesn’t think so. Valve knows what I need. And Left 4 Dead is it. L4D puts everything together into a fantastic game. It manages to work on a number of different levels. Which is why Left 4 Dead is my Multi-player Game of 2008.

Visuals

At some point, we’re going to have the “games as art” talk. I promise I won’t be too pretentious, but it needs to happen. Fortunately for you, that is not what this category is about. We’re talking about the visual merit of games.

I don’t play games because they look pretty. Lots do, but I rarely notice it until after the fact. Story captures me first. Only two games managed to be exceptions this year.

Spore was an awful game. It tried to be five different games and didn’t succeed in any of them. Which is too bad, because Spore’s Creature Creator is fantastic. And the game almost deserves my coveted visuals award… Almost.

Braid was a little game that filled big shoes. It was a short independent title that changed my opinion on “indie” games. From the scenery to the characters to the effects, everything in the game was interesting to look at. I think I’ll be keeping an eye out for anything else David Hellman (the artist) does.

Obviously, Braid is my Visual Game of 2008.

Audio

This category almost went to Braid. It was as simple as a coin toss between it and Left 4 Dead.

Horror is a hard genre to score. Valve could have used a very generic soundtrack that kinda fit most scenarios. It would have been okay and nobody would have faulted them for it. Instead, Valve decided to have an Audio Director. It would be a program that acted differently for each player. And it would play certain musical cues based on various environmental factors, the presence or absence of specific creatures, and events in the game. They weren’t even focused on whether you actively listened to it. Instead, they wanted to provide something that would help give you subconscious clues as to what was occurring in the game world around you.

It seems silly typing that, but they pulled it off. The way music is done in L4D is enough for my praise alone. Fortunately, they also have four fantastic voice actors who really drive the game. They sound legitimately scared/happy/hurt or whatever the game requires them to be. The only (very minor) complaint I have is that the voice actor for Bill was also the voice talent for Father Gregori in Half-Life 2. I mean, hell. Yes. That character was awesome entirely because of the man behind his audio, but it throws me off every time I hear him. I constantly expect the crazy shepherd to start ranting about his flock…

All in all, the game is a fantastic example of how music/audio should be done. Not just in a horror game, but in a game in general. For that, Left 4 Dead is my Audio Game of 2008.

Story

The story isn’t the meat of a game for some. Which is fine. World of Goo doesn’t need a complex plot to be awesome. But there is also much more to story than just the general plot. The script and dialogue is vital. Shamus at Twenty Sided has already talked about how Fallout 3 failed in this regard, so I won’t harp on it any further.

Within the story category is also believability. Both in characters and in the general world. I don’t mean that everything has to take place on Earth in 2009. But it does have to take place in a way that makes sense. If you create a universe and then contradict the rules of that universe, you’ve just hurt your story. Same with characters. I will let people get away with a lot in their games, but a person who doesn’t follow any realistic pattern of behavior? That’s idiotic.

Which brings me to the game that had the best story for 2008. A game that is so filled with idiocy that it makes me laugh to put it on here. But the game established a world, made the characters, and then crafted them believably. And it did so in a way that poked fun at… well… everyone.

I’m talking about Forumwarz. They describe it as “a browser-based RPG about Internet Culture”. And they should have added “and everything that is wrong with that culture”. It is a very clever, well designed satire of a world I spent a lot of time in. From the script to the characters to the dialogue to the consistency. I wouldn’t have thought of this game if it hadn’t been on Kotaku’s Goaties nominations. But the game really is a perfect example of how story can be managed.

And that makes Forumwarz my Story Game of 2008.

Independent

There are those (like Jay Branson) who have been fighting the good fight for independently developed games. But indie games have it pretty tough. Without the backing of a big publisher, they don’t have the finances to get in the door and they don’t have a large team to help do the work. Yet they’re still expected to turn out polished, intelligent games that nobody has thought of.

And yes, I expect that. There are people who give indie games a free ride because they’re indie. I don’t. I have no problem spending $20 on an untried team, but if you’ve made a bad game I will tell people. I may not have a big soapbox to stand on, but at least my friends will know. Don’t feel bad, indie developers. I don’t just do this for your games. I also do it for crap like Mirror’s Edge or Spore.

Fortunately, this year had a number of awesome indie games. Glancing over the this year’s Independent Games Festival Winners and I see a lot of fantastic work. Audiosurf was, from my understanding, cool. Desktop Tower Defense is an addiction I may never be free of. World of Goo blew me away with how awesome the work of two individuals could be. Braid and Castle Crasher both made it to X-Box Live and succeeded (incredibly well, as I understand it).

World of Goo happened to with for Design Innovation this year. It also won my cold-hard cash. And I can’t think of an indie game that work as well, in every way possible, as World of Goo.

So, congratulations 2D Boy. Some random guy on some random blog just named World of Goo my Indie Game of 2008.

Game of the Year

2008 was a good year for my X-Box and PC. And most of the games I mentioned deserve praise for giving me something fun to do when I wasn’t work my ass off. But to name any one of them as Game of the Year would be silly. I mean, Braid was probably my game of September. GTA4 for some other month. And I went through six or seven weeks of Forumwarz awesomeness. But none of them really fit my “top spot”.

Which is fine. I have enough trouble deciding my favorite color, let alone a game that was superior to all others. Sure, it is anti-climatic to end a Game of the Year list saying “all games are awesome”. But nothing stood out so far above the ground to be definitely named the winner. Maybe 2009 will come with it some incredible gaming experiences. Maybe the latest Wii title will revolutionize the entire industry and make me reconsider gaming as I understand it.

But that’ll be 2009. And that’s too far into the future to consider.

So, thanks gaming industry, for a 2008 worthy of at least one blog post.

You know, except when it does.

Fallout 3 was made by Bethesda Software. They, for the memory impaired, created Oblivion. Some have accused F3 of being Oblivion with guns. That, I think, misses the target. The difference between the two games is one of awesomeness. That is to say, Fallout 3 awesome. And there was no guarantee that it would be. After all, after the nuclear holocaust one could easily say “Oh, there isn’t a lot left of the world” and have vast empty spaces. Sure, it would be pretty, but I don’t really know if that is the world to be playing a video game in.

Now yes, the Capital Wasteland it takes place in is the post-apocalyptic D.C. area, but it certainly isn’t empty. Scattered around the area are hundreds of people trying to survive. From the relative ordinary such as Big Town (where a rag-tag group is barely surviving) and Agetha (who likes the violin) to the downright insane like The Family and Andale. Not to mention everything in between.

You don’t have to come across it all and won’t if you strictly follow the game’s main plot. In fact, the storyline of Vault 101 should take about ten hours and show you only a dozen of the locations in the game. Yes, those places have some interesting bits (I especially liked Liberty Prime: “Communism equals failure”), but the game doesn’t come into its own without some random exploration of the Fallout 3 world.

Which brings us to a point I can’t come to terms with. My problem with Oblivion was that the world was too open. There was too much to do and not enough focus. Strange, then, that I’m praising the same aspect of F3. I can’t entirely explain it, except to say that Oblivion never captivated me and Fallout 3 did so constantly.

Fallout 3 isn’t perfect.

• The writing sucks. I try not to waste my time with poorly written books. I hated The Happening because of the stilted dialogue and flat writing. And Fallout 3 may be just as bad as M. Night Shyamalan.
• The game is buggy. Companions have no difficulty following you on a flat plain, but moving over debris makes them lose their mind. Sometimes the graphics will spasm (first time it happened, I thought I might be having a stroke). Enemies can disappear, fly, and teleport.
• It is a sandbox game that nudges you to follow the main plot, only to completely end the game once the main plot is over.
• It isn’t Fallout 2.

But even amidst all these imperfections, I found myself having fun. I had fun for many hours and got to see a lot of the game that Bethesda designed. And, like many of the games in my collecton, I’m done with it. I don’t know how many hours I logged on it. Somewhere around 40, I’m sure. So I spent some time with enjoyment and Bethesda got my money.

Sounds like a win-win to me.

Even though decades have past since the prime of the major controversies surrounding D&D, some of the reactions I get when I mention my “role-playing thing” astound me. Sure, there have been some instances where I’ve been surprised; I met my best friends in high school by overhearing a conversation on non-weapon proficiencies. But such instances are rare. More often, I find myself on the receiving end of strange looks and muffled laughter. It has been 27 years since Mazes and Monster, 26 since B.A.D.D., and 24 since Dark Dragons, but RPGs have not entirely escaped the fear-mongering of their history.

I don’t play D&D to escape from reality. I don’t play because I can’t make “real” friends. I don’t play because I’ve made a pact with the devil. These misconceptions come from completely mistaken notions of what D&D is about. One could not play through a session or read the books and come to these conclusions. Because playing D&D is about creation.

The very first act all players undertake is to build a character. These characters can be anything you dream of. While there are some rules, they serve to guide, not restrict. From there, you move into the real meat of an RPG: the game-play. Together, with a group of friends, you write a story. The Dungeon Master narrates, but everyone is involved in the details. After a night of play, half a dozen people have come together and made something. And there are groups that do this on a weekly basis. How many people can claim they do something similar? How many people really use their creativity and build something awesome once a week? Or even once a month?

Now I will grant that some horrible things have occurred while playing various role-playing games. Kids have killed each other while acting as their characters. People have used D&D and other such games to share views that are either hurtful or bigoted. The problem in these situations is not Dungeons & Dragons, but the people playing it. Just as Thomas Dixon’s books about White Supremacy don’t mean that all books are inherently racist, a few negative instances don’t point to a flaw in RPGs.

Don’t worry. I’m not trying to convert you to playing D&D. But I do think that it’s time people stopped cracking wise about my hobby. I’ll have fun my way. You have fun your way. And we’ll ignore each other like God intended. Sound good?

Eckhart coming back as Two-Face? I vote not likely, since the character DIED (feel free to argue otherwise, but you’re wrong). Play with the Scarecrow some more? I can’t imagine that working. And I don’t think that Johnny Depp could live up to the role of the Joker. The basis of the next Batman cannot come from Nolan’s established history; it will have to be drawn from the rest of the Batman mythos.

Catwoman? Already been done well. There might not be anything new to do with her. The Penguin? He’s a mobster and the mob has become, especially since the Joker took it as far as it could go. Bringing Ra’s al Ghul back in a way, using his daughter. It would be an easy way to add a female character to an increasingly male-dominated cast. I don’t think that there is enough to the character of Clayface for a movie to based on. We could go through Batman’s entire Gallery of Villains, but enough about what won’t work…

If Mr. Nolan is reading this, I’ve got some plans for him that I (in my infinite wisdom) think would make for an awesome third (and final) Batman movie.

For starters, the Animated Series had an awesome character that was based around the Joker: Miss Harley Quinn, at the psychiatrist who went mad after working with the Joker. Make her a copy-cat who tries to live up to his legacy, but is sloppy and gets caught early in the film (similar to the Scarecrow in The Dark Knight). The new character would give a taste of the same sort of chaos without having to live up to Ledger’s performance. My personal favorite for the role would be Summer Glau.

One of the villains I hear tossed around a lot is the Riddler. I think the appeal for him is because he is so similar the Joker as a crazy-man. Obviously, that would be a massive failure. But he could work if you played on his love for puzzles and made Edward Nygma into a private detective who has been hired to catch Batman. While the Gothem Police as entirely reactionary (Batman acts, they respond), E. Nygma would play against Batman’s crime-fighter role and lay a trap. He would create the persona of the Riddler and fake heists in order to learn more about who Batman is before setting the ultimate Bat-trap. For some reason, I can’t see anyone but Jude Law in the role.

My final idea is my favorite, but finding the right actor for the role could be difficult. I have always been a fan of Bane, the man who broke the Bat. The Bane of Batman & Robin was a horrible rendering of the character. Bane is supposed to be incredibly strong, but also incredibly intelligent. In the Knightfall storyline, Bane was able to deduce Bruce Wayne’s secret identity. With Batman III, we could see Wayne becoming increasingly more careless with nobody left to live for and the constant struggles with the Gotham P.D. taking their toll, Wayne finds himself unable to live up to hiding his identity. After all, with Rachel Dawes gone, there is nobody left who can be hurt because of him (witty line from Alfred goes here). Bane picks up on all of the scattered clues, goes after Bruce and catches him weak. This would be after a particularly bad fight with a special forces squad designed to take Batman out. And, just as in the comic, Bane breaks Wayne’s back.

Of course, the movie couldn’t end there. So during the rest of the action, we would need another character. Someone who could play the same role as Jean-Paul of Knightfall or Terry McGinnis of Batman Beyond. We’re not looking for a Robin, because that character doesn’t yet with with Nolan’s mythos. Instead we’re looking for someone who can take up the role of Batman. In Batman Begins, Wayne said, “A man is just flesh and blood and can be ignored and destroyed. But as a symbol… as a symbol, I can be incorruptible, everlasting”. Batman, the symbol, is more important than Bruce Wayne will ever be. Bane can break Bruce Wayne, but if the mantle can be passed on to someone else, then the symbol of Batman can live on and be the hero Gotham City needs.

Wouldn’t that be a good way to end Nolan’s series? It would give us an ending to the story of Bruce Wayne (who has, really, been what the Nolan’s Batman movies have been about. Yes, it is a Batman movie, but Wayne is the main character). It would also give us an open-ended feeling. “More things will happen, after this movie”. So, Mr. Nolan, if you would like to steal my idea and make a movie about it, I would be okay with that.