...The Very Gods Themselves

02 Feb 2016

J. Bryan Lowder for Slate:

What we need is conscious cuddling, cuddling that takes into account the realities of our bodies, so easily taxed, and the pressures of a fallen social system that unnecessarily sorts us into limiting categories of big and little.

It is entirely possible that this piece is the most absurd and ill-conceived collection of thoughts that I have ever linked to. Not because the content is itself ridiculous – although it is, deliberately so – but because Lowder seems to be aiming for intellectual satire and misses the mark altogether. He certainly wants to mock the faux social conscientiousness and pseudo intellectualism that marks a great deal of online interactions these days, but instead of being a thoughtful parody his writing becomes indistinguishable from that which it mocks because it fails to follow any sort of coherent thread.

If you think I’m kidding, wait until you get to the part where he trips headfirst rabbit hole of his own design when he states, categorically, that spooning “is fundamentally a sexist arrangement”.